Rude Oxfordians

Dear Oxfraud,

My husband no longer shows the slightest interest in starting a conversation with me, let alone showing any kind of sexual interest.

After spotting an open copy of Ovid's Metamorphoses in Hogarth's Rake's Progress, he spent two years proving (quite successfully in my eyes) that the 17th Earl of Oxford was responsible for Hogarth's entire oeuvre. In fact his connections between the island in The Tempest and the island on the A4 known as the Hogarth Roundabout are really quite compelling. When he presented his findings at The 85th Vatican Council, Oxfordianism's CentrePiece Academic Symposium, someone called Mark Anderson rubbished his ideas and someone called Stritmatter issued what he called an ex cathedra statement saying that work dating from earlier than 1386 or later than 1749 could not be considered as Oxford's. Furthermore, he said he had a PhD and told my husband he was mad.

His life is now broken.

Can you recommend an authorship candidate who might be both acceptable to Oxfordians but hitherto undiscovered? 

Yours. Heartbroken, Greenford, Middx.

Dear Heartbroken

You have our sympathy. I suggest your husband looks at other authorship issues. Could he not, for example, try to prove  that Ronald Reagan wrote the works of Daphne du Maurier? I'm sure there's lots of good evidence. Do let us know if the idea appeals and we will find something to help get him started.

Aunty Oxfraud.

Lovely Artwork from http://www.cbrd.co.uk